about the music
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Music, to me, is the soundtrack of spirituality. It's how I communicate concepts for which words are not enough. It's how I create something too complex for a picture, to inexplicable for a poem. With music I can use words as far as I can take them, but I can also also map a shortcut to the feeling involved. |
Though I learned music as a group activity, lately I prefer to create music alone.
I am most comfortable singing. I love the feeling, I love the breathing, I love the expression one can achieve with only air and a body. These days my favorite instrument is the computer. I have played keyboards, 12 string and electric guitar, but I've found computers can do most everything I need these days.
I try not to get hung up making my recordings perfect. I don't spend a minute of my life thinking about whether or not my music will sell. I only try to make sure it feels honest.
Barbara Kingsolver, in talking about writing, said:
"Close the door. Write with no one looking over your shoulder. Don't try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It's the one and only thing you have to offer.”
I'm trying.
Sometimes music balloons into existence unexpectedly. Sometimes it's a calculated activity, with planning and intent. But usually music comes toward me, from what feels like some other place. A place that is separated from my conscious awareness but still a part of me. I have to listen for it to receive it. I have to slow down, be patient, desire it without expectation.